To Trust and Be Trusted by Alyssa Boss
Going to Thailand alone was one of the scariest, and freeing things I’ve ever had the privilege of doing. It was truly me, on my own with the Holy Spirit. I was able to talk to my mom on the phone or skype her, but when I had to go to the airport and board my plane to New York? Alone. When I had to board my plane to Taiwan and fly for fifteen hours, over vast ocean? Alone. When I boarded my flight to Bangkok? Alone. Believe me, I was terrified of the long flights over large bodies of water. My knees were practically shaking and my stomach was in knots. But at the same time that I was sitting there, scared, I was smiling because of the opportunity to be nervous and afraid and shaky about those things. I rather live a thousand days nervous but ready, rather than calm and complacent in my own safe place.
God provided little messages here and there to calm me. Whether through my mom in a call before I boarded a plane, through a couple that I got to tell about my trip and in return they gave me flying tips, or finding a girl on my team that had the same flight from Taiwan to Thailand with me, God gave me enough reminders and spiritual hugs to calm me. I knew the Holy Spirit was with me the whole time, but the traveling alone was enough to test my trust and keep me on my toes.
Once I reached Thailand, I had to acclimate to a new group of people, a new language, a new culture. I wasn’t even in love with Bangkok and it’s people the first day or two. It took a little bit for them to grow on me. Yet, once I felt that love stirring for Bangkok and it’s people, it took root. Deeply and irreversibly, I fell for the city, the country, the people. I’ve never met such kind, gentle people, readily open to relationship. I was taught so many things during my time in Bangkok. It’s one of the best experiences I’ve ever been blessed to have in this life.
God reopened my eyes to the importance of how you invest your time, and how it testifies of your intentions to the people who are the focus of your ministry. Even to the point of not being idle with my time, doing something that will testify of my reason for being there and whether or not I reflected the heart of the Father.
Time is so important, but HOW I spent it was a million times more crucial. I was awakened to the need for relationships. I already knew on some level that relationships are the point of ministry, to gain trust and be of help, to serve and to lead, to love and to offer accountability, to be there and not just be hanging out. We didn’t get to “rescue” anyone from trafficking or exploitation, the prostitutes in the bars didn’t throw in the towel and give up their sin-filled lifestyle. It was so much more in depth, so much more complicated than that. What I did do is offer friendship. We spoke of Jesus and His love for them. Some are even saved. But we didn’t yank anyone out of the bars, or get a headcount of salvations. We spent time with those valuable women, we showed how much we cared and our heart for them right where they are at. We loved them, hurting, broken and in sin. We offered hugs and “good touch”, things that weren’t intertwined with the notions of sex or being bought. We lavished our time and attention on them, making them feel valued and helping them realize that they are IMPORTANT to us.
They mean something to us. They aren’t a statistic, they aren’t a salvation count, they aren’t a project. They are a friendship, a sister to us. I can’t even place into words all the things my heart felt there, all the things that I saw, or all the things the Holy Spirit has revealed to me. I am so blessed by such a painful, realistic, love-filled, good experience such as Bangkok, Thailand.
